OK, I made it through the notorious first vignette in "Haunted." I trust you all are champing at the bit to share your own stories about the yuckiest thing that ever happened to you while masturbating. Or not.
Seriously, though, are there kids who devote huge amounts of time and energy looking for weird ways to do it?
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When reading this chapter I recalled seeing a TV show about urban legends, I think on MTV, and this one was listed as true. The show even spoke with the police who responded to the call.
Also, a friend of mine from the first time I went to OU told me about one summer when he was 15 and he went to Bible camp: a girl was sent home because of a glass Coke bottle.
The bottle didn't have a cap, and well ... the suction she generated was pretty strong. The youth minister had to break off the bottom of the bottle with a hammer to get it out.
Gosh, I don't have any yucky masturbation stories.
There was this kid Scott in junior high who got caught doing it in his kitchen by his older brother and the brother's friends. And ever after Scott was known as "Kitchen."
But that's not yucky. Just humiliating.
OK, I see no one's masturbating, but is anyone READING?
I always try to do a little of both.
At separate times and places.
I'm not. Reading, that is. I hope to pick it up again pretty soon.
It's on my nightstand. The book, that is.
I should be able to finish it, now that school is over (except for grading). I rather enjoyed the reflexology story. Christy, I think you missed an angle with that reflexologist you interviewed. Hhehe
Hmmmm. I haven't started the book. Sounds like I need to get going.
I did too much blogging to read some more. Sounds like I'm where you're at, kc.
My next posts have to be my last couple days at work, so I should get more read this weekend.
Ooh, I liked the reflexology story too. Foot-rub intrigue. Hehe
The reflexologist offered me a free session after the story came out. It killed me to explain I couldn't accept it.
I don't have any masturbation stories, but I do have something interesting: Erin just e-mailed me a link to a website with nude pictures of our niece.
That lady is not your niece, Ben. But I'm sure you're enjoying the pictures all the same.
Are you sure? I've never been able to figure out those familial words.
Is she my niece-in-law? Or just my nephew's wife? Chris is my nephew, right? I hope so. I've always wanted to be Uncle Ben.
If what you're saying is true, then my aunts and uncles are not Erin's aunts and uncles. Is that right? I don't think it is.
Okay, back to your original question. Here is an interesting quote about Albert Fish:
"Paraphilia - which literally means 'abnormal love' - is the technical term for sexual deviation. According to the psychiatric experts who examined him, Albert Fish had spent his life indulging in every known form of paraphilia, plus a few aberrations that were unknown at the time. For example, he would insert a long-stemmed rose into his penis and look at himself in the mirror, then he would remove the rose and eat it. His other sexual deviations included sadism, masochism, flagellation, exhibitionism, voyeurism, piquerism, pedophilia, coprophagia, undinism, fetishism, urolagnia, and cannibalism."
Chris is your nephew by marriage. His wife is simply your nephew's wife. That is my understanding. Earlier I quizzed the newsroom and four out of four people agreed that someone does not become your niece by virtue of marrying your nephew.
Your aunts and uncles are NOT Erin's aunts and uncles!
Yes, BUT people generally do call their aunt's husband "uncle." I always did as a kid. My Aunt Rachel and Uncle Marion, my Uncle Chuck and Aunt Susie. And my relatives have called Ben "Uncle Ben" in regard to my little nieces. Maybe it's not the same in reverse for nieces and nephews.
I did too. My mom's sister's husband is my uncle by marriage, but I don't think he would be my spouse's uncle because my spouse and I are not cousins or siblings. If he were my spouse's uncle, then he (the "uncle") would have a niece and a nephew who were married to each other. Can that be right?
Ben is Christopher's uncle by marriage, but Deanna is not Ben's niece by marriage. Right?
Yeah, I guess that's right. I certainly don't consider Ben's uncles to be MY uncles. And I wouldn't call Deanna my niece. I'd call her my nephew's wife.
Sorry, Ben, you lose.
Why are you people the authority? I'm gonna look it up!
Am I going to get in trouble if I Google "undinism" at work?
OK, on the assumption that you didn't google it:
Undinism is an unusual sexual practice entailing arousal from water, or sexual intercourse in a bath tub. Undinism can also be a medical term used to describe the state of attaining sexual and/or erotic gratification by urinating or being urinated on. Often called 'water sports' but is more commonly known as 'golden showers.'
Ha! I hadn't Googled it. Thanks for going where I dare not.
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